Interview Questions 10

Would you rather fight 1 horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses?

I have heard this one asked in numerous Q&A sessions and Reddit AMAs and apparently, it is a question that job interviewers have actually asked. I thought I would get it out of the way. I was just actually thinking about fighting water fowl on Saturday because I was reminded of how mean geese are. In my experience, ducks are pretty chill. I used to walk through fields of ducks in college and they just shuffled out of my way. However, if I were to meet a duck bigger than me, I would shudder to think what its response would be. Ducks eat fish, worms, and insects. These things are much smaller than a duck. I do not want to be consumed by a giant duck. I think I could take the horses eventually. I do not think the herd mentality translates into an attacking swarm of horses. I think the horses would probably barely fight back aside from kicking a little and trying to run away. I think it would be pretty sad but at least I would survive. I am usually going to pick the choice that allows me to survive. Wow, this got dark quicker than I expected but at least I am prepared to be asked this in the future.

If you were falsely convicted of a crime, how would you adapt to prison life?

Thankfully, not something I have to think about often but I have thought about it recently due to a really good story arc on Criminal Minds. Prison is really, really, really difficult. I live in the United States and our prisons are completely broken. Instead of being a safe atmosphere for criminals to explore their guilt and restart their lives, it is instead a repository where we stick both the criminals and the innocent. Prisons have become cauldrons where we mix some of the worst elements of our society (at least the worst of the poor parts) and then we walk away and let whatever happen. Prisons are dangerous places to be. While I am good at keeping my head down, I feel like I would eventually run afoul of somebody acting out their frustrations. I would live my life absolutely obeying the guards and counting the hours until I could be locked back in my cell. Then comes the mental effects. I think about if they would let me have pen and paper or even books. If not, I think I would probably go numb and shuffle about until I was released. That is if I was ever released.

What commercial convinced you NOT to buy the product they are pushing?

Alright, this question is not sad like the first two. I watch a lot of YouTube and there is this one commercial that keeps repeating that has me really confused and not wanting to buy their product. I cannot remember which brand but it is for deodorant (Edit: It’s Dove). It just has a lineup of guys stammering about deodorant and perspiration while looking embarrassed. Then the narrator says “Guys don’t talk about antiperspirant” and I get confused. Is this a stereotype that I was unaware of? I do not think that anybody really talks about that particular product because it is a boring topic of conversation. Also, as a guy, I feel that if the topic came up I could easily talk about antiperspirant. Weird. Also, any commercial about Axe Body Spray. First, I have a sensitive nose when it comes to fragrance and this product was already a no go. However, the way they objectify women makes me want to disrespect any guy who actually uses that product. Really dumb.

If you could time travel, where would you go?

I think I may have already answered this question or a similar one but I have a different answer as of this week. I was reminded of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World and how six of them have been destroyed. I would want to travel back and see each of those wonders. The Colossus of Rhodes sounds like an impressive statue that I would love to look at and see the massive feat of art. The Hanging Gardens of Babylon sound amazing and I have no idea what that would even look like. While I have seen plenty of modern lighthouses, I am intrigued to see an ancient one in the form of The Lighthouse of Alexandria. The Statue of Zeus at Olympia sounds exciting, similar to the Colossus but with the added bonus of artwork of one of my favorite mythological figures. The Temple of Artemis at Ephesus would be cool because I would get to see a long dead religion and a working temple dedicated to it. The same goes for the Mausoleum at Halicarnassus where I could see how the ancient world dealt with their dead. As a bonus, I would love to stop by the Library of Alexandria even though I could not read a word of their collection.

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