Posts Tagged ‘Disney’

Media Update 11/17/22

November 17, 2022

Hocus Pocus 2

I was a big fan of the original mostly because I was in the correct age group when it came out. When I found out that there was going to be a sequel, I was intrigued but not exactly excited. Of course, the Sanderson sisters Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimy are back and just as goofy as ever. They still have those characters down pat. Doug Jones also returns and gets more to do as Billy Butcherson. Whitney Peak, Belissa Escobedo, and Lilia Buckingham are the newcomers as the heroes of the movie and all do a really great job moving the plot along. Tony Hale and Sam Richardson bring a lot of comic relief. The problem I had is that the script is kind of a mess. They spend too much time on the “witch out of time” gags and gets muddled by jokes that did not land with me. Also, they kind of lost some of the characterization of the Sanderson Sisters from the first one. I really did like the flashback and the actresses that played the young Sanderson sisters killed it. I would not recommend this movie.

Ultraviolet and Black Scorpion

I am a big fan of Lucha and any show that takes a stab at trying to embrace the culture will be an automatic watch for me. The show is about a young woman who is gifted a magic Lucha mask that transforms her into a superhero. Her uncle also has a mask and tries to teach her the Lucha way. Scarlet Estevez shines as the main character, full of energy and joy. JB Villareal is great as the gruff Black Scorpion, trying to balance being a caring uncle with being a demanding teacher. The rest of the cast is really good, mostly made up of the title characters’ family. Lucha is a big part of their lives and culture and something that binds them together. It is one part sitcom and one part superhero show. It balances the two pretty well. I recommend this show.

Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb

I always thought that the idea of this franchise was pretty neat and I had fond memories of the first movie and I remembered the second one being alright. Ben Stiller is great when he is acting as a normal guy just trying to do the right thing. Robin Williams, Rami Malek, Owen Wilson, Steven Coogan, and Skyler Gisondo are great at bringing the comedy and are all fun to watch. Dan Stevens is great as the clueless Lancelot, basically doing his best Chris Hemsworth as Thor impression. The movie comes to a grinding halt whenever Rebel Wilson or Ricky Gervais show up on the screen. They do a lot of mugging and bits that fell flat for me. I am shocked that this movie was made in 2014 because it aged like milk. Too many gay jokes, piss jokes, sexist jokes, and so on. I found myself groaning through a lot of it. This kind of sucks because I thought that the parts that worked really worked. I would not recommend this movie.


Music of the Week:

Sabrina Carpenter – Nonsense

Rod Wave – Break My Heart

Bryson Tiller – Outside

Nickelback – Those Days

Mashup of the Week:

William Maranci Mashups – Closer But It’s Funkytown By Lipps Inc.


Weekly Update:

  • This week’s theme is “Magical Whimsy”
  • I watched a ton of YouTube and Twitch: Barry Kramer, Impact Wrestling, All Elite Wrestling, Emily D. Baker, Tamara Chambers, LegalEagle, NWA, Dead Meat, Quinton Reviews, Onsta, Savy Writes Books, Gabi Belle, Brutalmoose, Growing Up in Scientology, Watcher, Some More News, Tales from the Territories
  • I watched more Chucky Season 2
  • I watched more The Blacklist Season 9
  • I watched more The Strain Season 1
  • I watched more Bob’s Burgers Season 12
  • I watched more Doom Patrol Season 3
  • I started Titans Season 4
  • I watched Amityville Clownhouse
  • I watched Jack vs. Lanterns
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Disney: The Dark Kingdom (Theme Park Design)

September 24, 2022

I thought I would give my take on the rumored Disney villains park. In my mind, it would be more for teens to adults allowing for a spookier atmosphere and leaning into a more adult atmosphere. I mean, it would still be Disney so it would not go too far but kids would not be the main demographic. These are just some of the attractions that I thought of. It is divided into sections much like the Magic Kingdom. 

Maleficent’s Castle

Vile Village– The long road leading to Maleficent’s castle where villains can feel free to be themselves.

Maleficent’s Castle

Most Disney parks need a castle as their centerpiece. The jet-black castle that sat on the Forbidden Mountain would be a perfect choice. Its asymmetry is a great contrast to the picture-perfect castles in other parks. I think adding some gray ornamental flourishes similar to the brambles from the Kingdom Hearts franchise might look good.

Cruella’s Dress Shop – A villain-themed clothing store owned by Cruella De Ville.

The Wicked Spindle – A fancy restaurant themed on Sleeping Beauty and Maleficent

The Ruby Apple Cafe – A more casual dining experience themed on the Evil Witch

Lotso’s Army – A dark ride themed on the various Toy Story villains getting together

Straight to Hades – A boat ride on Charon’s boat through Hades where one can see depictions of various legendary greek heroes. The ride is hosted by Pain and Panic as 

Tartarus BBQ – A Hades themed barbecue place

The wild amusement park of Pleasure Island

Pleasure Island – An area based on the same place from Pinnochio mixed with the now-closed adult area of Disney.

Oogie Boogie’s Ghost Coaster – A dark coaster designed after the blacklight visuals from Oogie’s number from Nightmare Before Christmas.

Oogie Boogie’s Casino – A casino themed on Halloween and horror.

Turbo’s Arcade – A massive indoor arcade themed on the insane villain and also the MCP from Tron.

Stromboli’s Theater – A theater where versions of Disney stories are told biased in favor of the villains.

Cruella’s Road Racers – A high-speed driving ride based on the maniacal driving of Cruella De Ville.

Ralph’s Wrecking Rampage – A coaster themed on Ralph which he protests because he’s not “that” kind of villain.

The salty streets of a smuggler town similar to Tortuga from the movies.

Smuggler’s Bay – A lawless area near the water

Davey Jones: Terror of the Deep – A journey through scenes of Davey Jones punishing the people of the Caribbean along with his monster crew

Captain Hook’s Ship – A ride on Captian Hook’s ship out in the water

Smee’s Seaside Pub – A simple pirate pub

Ursula’s Grotto – A dark ride mixed with a splashdown ride that explores Ursula’s legendary lair.

The Weasels 

The woods have eyes.

Wicked Woods – A spooky forest-themed area.

The Snuggly Duckling – A recreation of the tough bar from Tangled.

Gaston and Clayton’s Hunting Lodge and Tavern – An eating and drinking establishment owned and operated by the two arrogant Disney hunters

The Flight of the Sanderson Sisters – A flight simulator in the vein of Soarin’ where you fly a broom and terrorize people with the Sandersons.

Yzma’s Zoo – A trip through an animatronic zoo with the implication that all of the animals are transformed humans. 

The Evil Queen’s Revenge – Basically Snow White’s Scary Adventures but lean even more into the horror elements

Maybe a giant recreation of the Cave of Wonders lion.

Atrocious Adventures – An area themed on more global and adventurous experiences.

Charles Muntz Flight of Adventure – A flight simulator in the vein of star tours that details the heroic deeds of disgraced adventurer Charles Muntz

The Elephant Boneyard – A dark ride where the riders are stalked by Scar and the hyenas

Glomgold’s Minecart Ride – A frantic mine cart ride similar to the Indiana Jones Adventure mixed with Big Thunder Mountain Railroad

Journey into Jafar’s Lamp – A terrifying and surreal thrill ride into the world inside of Jafar’s lamp where he has complete power.

Monsters, Inc. : Right to Scare – A journey into the Monster’s Inc. world with those still dedicated to scaring and not laughing

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 9

September 3, 2022

Belle pulled a flustered Tiana aside who was watching her husband run up the mountain toward a monster taller than any building she had ever seen. Tiana struggled to pull her attention back to Belle, her heart pounding. She was not used to being in combat.

“What do you need, Belle?” Tiana asked, putting on a brave face.

Belle gave Tiana a tight, stressed smile. “I need you to do what you do best, Tiana,” she said. “I need you to follow a recipe.”

“Wait, really?” Tiana asked. “Is this really the time for beignets?”

“I would love to have whatever those are later,” Belle said. “But for now I need a potion and I need you to brew it.” Belle recited something from her spell book and waved her hand and a full kitchen with a cauldron. She waved her hand and a page from the book appeared in Tiana’s hands.

Tiana was startled but pleased. This was right up her alley and she was suddenly fired up again. “You got it,” Tiana said. “One potion coming up!” She rolled up her sleeves and cinched her hair tie a little together.

“Good,” Belle said. “We’re going to need a lot of it.”

“Right,” Tiana said and started to read while Belle ran back into the battle.


Up on Bald Mountain, Jasmine’s team approached the monster. She had shouted instructions at the group as they ran. Anna and Naveen picked up rocks and started to throw them at Chernabog. This drew the annoyed monster’s gaze from Grimhilde and toward the insignificant insects that dared even approach it. When Chernabog tried to swat at the group, Esmerelda and Eugene made everybody vanish in a puff of smoke. Jasmine lept from nowhere and stabbed her sword into the beast’s hand. The others followed suit and the beast howled in pain. Adam transformed into the Beast, ran up Chernabog’s arm, and clawed at its eye.

Chernabog struggled to pull Adam from its face for a while. When it tried to pull its hand away to help, the swords stuck in it dragged through its inky flesh. Jet black blood sprayed everywhere. Adam kept scrambling around the beast’s face until he was caught and thrown into a tree. Everybody regrouped and kept trying to get and keep Chernabog’s attention. They were not really going for damage. They noticed that Chernabog had quickly healed the heavy damage they had inflicted. This was going to be tough but besides Adam, none of them were really built for combat but they had a bunch of goofballs and flimflam artists. They had energy and could definitely do distracting.


Back at the foot of the mountain, Belle rejoined the fight against Grimhilde and started slinging spells at the witch. Grimhilde was now forced to fend off ice blasts from Elsa and magical energy from Belle. Merida found a spotted and started to fire arrows at Grimhilde. The first arrow actually sank into Grimhilde’s arm. The witch drew from her connection with Chernabog and the arrow vanished. The next time that Merida fired an arrow, Grimhilde was able to teleport out of the way. Merida was undeterred and kept firing. Grimhilde fended off Belle and Elsa’s attacks with dark energy. Aladdin and Aurora started to take turns running in to slash at the witch. Rapunzel used her hair to try and lasso Grimhilde but was unable to catch her. They were definitely pushing Grimhilde to her limits but she was crafty and was still drawing on Chernabog’s power.


Tiana worked feverishly in her makeshift kitchen, preparing ingredients for the potion. She had no time to look up at the mountain or over at her other friends. She was hyper-focused on her cooking. She had to be because she sensed that everything hinged on this potion. She turned to fill up the cauldron with water. She just had to hope that her new friends and her husband could keep it up to defeat the evil. She wiped her brow and leaned against the counter. It was hard work being a hero.

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 8

August 27, 2022

The group stepped through the portal one by one. Belle stepped through last and gasped as her eyes focused. Adam reached out to steady her, once more in beast form. She gratefully grabbed his arm to steady herself. Everyone stood stock still, momentarily barely having the nerve to breathe. It was definitely nighttime in this world but it felt artificial. There was no moon to be seen and the sky was awash in eerie waves of blue and green energies. However, that is not what made Belle gasp and paralyzed the group with fear. 

They were surrounded by an army that seemed to be made up of the armies of the other witches. They spotted what looked like citizens of Agrabah, citizens of Atlantica, beasts that must have been from Hawaii, and Maleficent’s creatures. Mixed in were unspeakable monsters of some other origin.  Luckily they were frozen in place, obviously poised for an upcoming attack. Their eyes were closed as if they had fallen asleep while standing up.

After taking a moment, the group all looked at each other and they moved forward, carefully picking their way through the army. Nobody wanted to accidentally brush up against somebody or something that might come to life and attack. There was no way this small group would last again an army of that size. Finally, they reached a large flat area free of the army. Standing in the middle of that was a woman and she was standing in front of an altar. The woman’s body was swirling with green and black energies.

Jasmine stepped forward. “Grimhilde,” she called out. “You will cease your pact with the creature known as Chernabog and you will dismiss your army. If you do this, your life will be spared but you will be imprisoned in your world of origin or in mine if they will not have you. I swear that you will not be harmed if you give up now.”

Grimhilde turned around and smirked. “Is that the deal?” she asked.

“That’s the deal,” Elsa said, stepping up beside Jasmine. 

Aurora also stepped up. “If you don’t take it, we are going to have to put up a fight,” she said. “We put down all of your friends. You don’t want to be next.”

“Friends?” Grimhilde asked and then laughed. “Merely pawns. I’m the one who made the deal with Chernabog. I just needed them to help amass an army and keep you lot busy. I would have liked it if they had succeeded in killing you but I suppose that was asking for too much.”

“It sounds like she’s not taking the deal,” Aurora said.

“Yes, I think I got that impression as well,” Jasmine said. “I tried to be fair. More than fair, I thought.”

“I believe in second chances,” Elsa said. “I’ve benefitted from one myself but I think she’s all out of chances.”

“Fools,” Grimhilde said bitterly. “I’ll deal with you as I dealt with my stepdaughter. I’ll make you watch as I conquer the worlds. I’ll make you watch as I pull the wings from all of the faeries and then I’ll execute all of you slowly and painfully.”

“I don’t think so,” Jasmine said. “We’re going to stop you from summoning Chernabog.”

Grimhilde laughed and it was the ugliest sound any of them had ever heard. “I have already summoned Chernabog. Even now he fully awakens from his long slumber,” she said. 

Grimhilde gestured toward the towering mountain and a jet-black creature larger than any of them had seen started to spread its wings. It glared angrily down at those who would dare oppose its disciple. Everybody instinctually pulled their weapons out.

“We’re doing this,” Jasmine yelled out. Aladdin ran up next to her and the two exchanged a lingering look.

“What’s the plan?” Anna called out.

“I’m going up the mountain to distract that thing,” Jasmine said. “The rest stay here and end the witch. Esmerelda, Anna, Eugene, Tiana, Naveen, and Adam with me.”

“I need Tiana down here, actually,” Belle called out. 

“Fine,” Jasmine said. “Let’s go.” Jasmine’s team went running after her up the mountain without question. There was no time to second guess plans.

Elsa launched the opening salvo, blasting Grimhilde with ice magic. The witch barely conjured fire magic to counter it as Elsa kept pressing her attack. It was clear that Grimhilde was more than up to the challenge.

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 7

August 6, 2022

Genie had provided everybody with a feast fit for royalty which made sense as many of them were royalty. They all ate and tried to remain in good spirits with the fight of their lives ahead of them. In the meantime, the fairies had set about building and enchanting armaments for the group. They all assembled before the portal where everything was laid out on a table. Flora floated over to the table and stood resolute.

“Aurora, step forward, my child,” Flora said and Aurora stepped forward. “You have inherited the Sword of Truth and the Shield of Virtue.” Fauna and Merryweather held them out and Aurora gratefully took them. Light swirled around her and new armor formed on her body. It had red, blue, and green accents. She stepped back into line.

“Aladdin, step forward,” Flora said and Alladin stepped forward. “A simple weapon but trusty in its familiarity. She handed him the familiar scimitar which he had been forced to pick up so many times. He hefted it and swung it a bit before stepping back into place.

“Jasmine, step forward,” Flora said and Jasmine stepped forward. “The simplest of weapons but perhaps the most useful.” She handed Jasmine a long wooden staff which reminded Jasmine of that piece of wood she had used once to vault from roof to roof. She returned to stand with Aladdin.

“Esmerelda, step forward,” Flora said and Esmerelda happily made her way forward. “Rather unwieldy weapons but we trust you.” She handed over a pair of chain whips.

“Have you ever seen me twirl ribbons?” Esmerelda asked. “This will be very similar.”

“Merrida, step forward,” Flora said and Merrida stepped forward. “Yours was an easy request and I know it will feel personal to you.” She held up a carefully crafted wooden bow with accents reminiscent of a bear. Merrida gripped her new bow and instantly leather armor formed over her body complete with a quiver of brand new arrows. She stepped back.to stand with the others.

“Flynn Rider, step forward,” Flora said.

“Eugene, actually,” he said as he stepped up. “You know what? It’s fine. The worlds are about to end, call me anything you want.”

“An ax from the Snuggly Duckling,” Flora said. “Swing true.”

“Thanks!” Flynn said and carried the ax away.

“Rapunzel, step forward,” Flora said and Rapunzel stepped forward. “Your request was strange but far be it from us to second guess a champion.” She held up a frying pan that shimmered with power and had the familiar symbol of her flower. Rapunzel took it with a grateful smile.

“I guess that’s not just for cooking,” Tiana said.

“It’s served me well in the past,” Rapunzel said with a shrug.

“Great, I saw it earlier and wanted one for myself,” Tiana said. “I’ve had to deal with unruly customers that way.”

Tiana stepped forward and received a very similar skillet, emblazoned with the symbol of a frog. She smirked and flipped it and caught it again.

“Naveen, step forward,” Flora said and Naveen stepped forward eagerly. “This was the most peculiar request but if it will help, we were happy to try our best.” She handed Naveen a rifle.

“Um, Naveen darling,” Tiana said. “These people don’t know what a gun is. Do you think it’s wise to show them?”

“Desperate times, Tiana,” Naveen said. “I’m sure nothing bad will come of this.”

“I hope you’re right,” Tiana said. She trusted her husband but did she trust the civilizations of the other worlds? That was a problem for later.

“Anna, step forward,” Flora said and Anna proudly stepped forward with her trademark smile. “A sword in the style of your homeland. It is short but foes who underestimate it do so at their peril, just like you Anna.” Anna took hold of the sword with the Arendelle seal on its hilt. She also grabbed a shield similar to the one Mattias used. She got a metal helmet as well.

“I’m fine with my ice powers,” Elsa said. “But thank you for the offer.”

“Similarly, I suppose I can transform and use my claws,” Adam said. “I’ve come to terms with that.” Belle squeezed his hand encouragingly and he squeezed hers back.

“Last but not least, Belle, please step forward,” Flora said. Belle stepped forward.

“I made this one,” Enchantress said.

“You helped,” Godmother said.

Belle picked up a book bound with leather and iron. She looked around at all of the confused faces and she smiled.

“It’s a book of spells,” Belle said. “A book is the most powerful thing in any world.”

Adam smiled and put his arm around Belle. “My clever wife,” he said.

“I suppose we’re ready,” Jasmine said.

The portal opened and it looked different than before. They could not see the other side and there was a sinister purple-black aura coming off of it. The group gathered their courage.

“Let’s go,” Aurora said.

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 6

July 23, 2022

Genie had conjured up a large table for everybody to sit at in the morning. Enchantress was a bit annoyed that Jasmine had sent so many people home already but Godmother had insisted that this was fate and she believed that they had who they needed. Enchantress had retorted that it was hard to believe in fate when their aspects of Chaos and Hope both existed. Jasmine eventually asked Genie to physically separate the two as their bickering escalated. Everybody filtered in and settled into their impromptu council meeting. They did not have an army but there were thirteen people, five fairies, and one genie at the table. It was nothing to sneeze at.

“You disappeared last night, Enchantress,” Belle said. “We let it go since we were so tired but now you will have to explain what you were up to.”

“I am as transparent as a window and open as a book,” Enchantress said. “I took the liberty of taking Yzma to her cell alongside Gothel. I then interrogated both of them.” Enchantress was just as smug as ever and her self-satisfaction unnerved everybody.

“Did you harm them?” Adam asked, folding his arms across his chest. He had let people around him get hurt, physically and emotionally and he was not about to let that happen again. Not without a fight.

“Really?” Enchantress asked. “These two may have been the most incompetent of this little coven but they did try to kill you just like Maleficent and Ursula. You would still show them mercy?” Her tone was playful and Godmother rolled her eyes, knowing the truth almost all at once.

“We don’t want to hurt people,” Tiana said. “If we have hurt people, it was to protect ourselves or stop them from doing something unspeakable.”

“Agreed,” Elsa said. “We do not torture people. I for one am working on being a better person, not sinking to new depths.” She still felt guilty about hurting her sister twice in her life and nearly destroying her own kingdom. She really was trying to do better moving forward.

“Relax,” Enchantress said. “I did not hurt even a hair on their heads. That almost never elicits true information anyway. They also were mostly left in the dark and would not have been able to scream their truth even under extreme duress.”

“Then your interrogation was a waste of time?” Aurora asked. Early on, she had tried to interrogate Ursula’s mind-controlled minions to no effect. Thankfully, Ursula’s death had freed them of their curse.

“I wouldn’t say that,” Enchantress said. “There are magicks one can use to bring a mind to an awareness of things they may have ignored or forgotten previously. Between the two of them, they had the information I needed. All of this was done without harm or any undue invasion of privacy. I know each of your codes of honor.”

“What information is that?” Godmother asked, her eyes narrowing as she asked.

“Why, the location of the final battle, of course,” Enchantress said. “We needed access. Those two were there but did not remember it. I combined their scraps of recollection. I can now open up a portal to the final battleground.”

“Where?” Godmother asked. “Where is it?” If she was asking that, there was no reason for concern for the witches. Godmother would have ended her truce with Enchantress even over the harm of the wicked.

“I could withhold it but as another sign of my loyalty, I will divulge the location,” Enchantress said. She was a born entertainer with an audience of one. Herself. “The final witch and her master are in a place called Bald Mountain.”

“We know witches,” Merida said. “But what manner of creature is this ‘master’?” She had indeed had a lot of experience with witches and distrusted all of this. She wanted to be ready for whatever was next.

“Chernabog is a being of pure dark magic that is linked to vast forces of darkness,” Godmother said. “What you saw with Maleficent and Ursula pale in comparison to the devils that Chernobog can unleash. If it becomes powerful enough to traverse the worlds, it will break reality as we know it.”

“Chernobog has to be linked to a mortal soul,” Enchantress said. “It has latched on to this evil queen, Grimhilde. If you take out Grimhilde, Chernobog will follow.”

“There isn’t another way?” Tiana asked, hesitant to kill anybody. She was a chef, not a killer.

“I’m afraid not,” Godmother said. “It’s too late for Grimhilde.”

“If it makes you feel any better,” Enchantress said. “She was killed once before. This is what she did with her second chance.”

Nobody looked happy about this but there were some nods. Second chances were important but so was the fabric of reality. This was a difficult thing to put on mortal shoulders.

“When do we leave?” Aurora asked.

“That’s the major hitch in the plan,” Enchantress said. “Chernobog knew what a threat fairies and other magical beings could be and banished most of us to this prison or elsewhere. We are barred from Bald Mountain.”

“Does that include me too?” Genie asked. “I’m ready to kick butt and chew bubble gum and I’m all out of bubble gum.”

“Sadly, you too, Genie,” Godmother said. “We will not be able to help.”

“Sorry, buddy,” Genie said to Aladdin.

“It’s ok, Genie,” Aladdin said. “Jasmine and I have beaten the odds before. You taught me that I can do anything if I trust in myself.”

“Aww, Al,” Genie said and hugged Jasmine and Aladdin.

“Then we’re on our own,” Belle said.

“No,” Anna said. “We’re in this together. We’re going to save all of our worlds.”

“We gear up and move out after another meal,” Aurora said. “Consult with Flora if you need weapons and armor. We can end this quick and go home safe and sound.”

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 5

July 9, 2022

Aurora set down her sword and took a deep breath before she started to unstrap her armor. She could not remember when she last removed her armor. It felt like weeks but it was probably only two days. Always being battle-ready took its toll and while the armor had mostly prevented physical scars, it did not protect her from the mental and emotional ones. She knew that she had gotten tougher but even the strongest person had their limits. She had definitely reached hers several times but she still had survived. She set one of her gauntlets next to her sword and flexed her fingers.

“Aurora?” the unmistakable voice of Fauna echoed through the chamber. “Is that you?”

Aurora smiled and turned to face the three fairies who had always been there for her. “Am I that hard to recognize under this armor?” she asked.

“We’d never fail to recognize you,” Merryweather said. “You are our sweet Aurora.” Her adorable smile warmed Aurora’s heart. That smile had helped her through some hard times.

“I’ve learned to be less than sweet when I need to be,” Aurora said. “I’m not sure that’s what you had in mind for me.”

All three fairies instantly rushed to hug her all at once, enveloping her with their love. It instantly brought another smile to her face as she hugged them back. 

“All we ever meant for you is to live and be happy,” Flora said. “We could never be disappointed in you, child. Well, not so much of a child now.”

“Besides, we approved of Prince Phillip riding to slay the dragon,” Fauna said. “It would be hypocritical of us to judge you for protecting yourself and others even with violence.”

“Hear, hear!” Merryweather called out. “Seeing you combine beauty with strength is a blessing that we would have gifted you if we could. I think our only objection is the poor state of your armor. We could have made much better armor.”

“In fact, we will,” Flora said. “We’ll design you and the team new armor.”

“Without arguing over the colors?” Aurora asked with a sly smile. “Again?”

“I beg you pardon?” Fauna asked.

“I’m sure we can take any design input that your heroes have to offer,” Flora said, putting a hand on Fauna’s shoulder. Merryweather put a hand on Fauna’s other shoulder. “That should cut down on any arguments.”

“Good,” Aurora said with a smile. “We could always use better equipment.”

“Speaking of better equipment,” Flora said. “We gave Phillip the Sword of Truth and the Shield of Virtue. We can give it to you now.”

“I’m honored,” Aurora said.

*               *                 *

“My princess!” Naveen shouted as he ran across the hall. He was his typically theatrical self, louder than life. It made Tiana smile.

“Naveen!” Tiana shouted as they embraced and kissed for more than a moment. It was like heaven, angels sang.

“It’s so good to see you safe again, my love,” Naveen said. “And just as beautiful as ever!”

“Mmm hmm,” Tiana said “What have I told you about doubting me and the excessive sweet talk?”

“Doubting you is foolish because you are an unstoppable Queen,” Naveen said. “Sweet talking you too much makes you nervous that I have an ulterior motive. There is no ulterior motive. I’m just so glad to see you again.”

“So you behaved yourself this time?” Tiana asked with a smirk.

“More than that,” Naveen said. “In fact, I fought honorably to liberate this place.”

“My love, forgive me if I say that sounds surprising,” Tiana said. “You’re not much of a fighter.” She smiled at him to let him know that this was only slight criticism.

Of course, it was Naveen so he deflected easily. “I’m a much better musician for sure,” he said. “It was difficult but I would climb mountains and ford rivers just to see you again. What are a few swords?”

Tiana gasped. “You’re not hurt are you?” she asked, stepping back to inspect Naveen who returned the favor. 

“No,” Naveen said. “Are you?” There was uncharacteristic fear in his eyes

Tiana shook her head. “I found some good new friends who protected me,” she said.

“I found the same,” Naveen said. They both relaxed, knowing that they were both well and truly safe.  “But it will be good to return home together.”

Tiana shook her head and placed a hand on Naveen’s chest. “Not yet,” she said. “There’s one more threat on the horizon. We can’t abandon them all now.”

Naveen nodded. “Whatever you want, Tiana,” he said. “I am by your side no matter what. I will walk through fire with you.”

“Well, hopefully, it won’t come to that,” Tiana said. “We’ll be back in the Big Easy before you know it and I’ll cook you a whole plate of beignets. We’ll get back to the restaurant and our family.” 

“When you say it, I believe it,” Naveen said. “What’s next?”

“We dig a little deeper and fight one last battle,” Tiana said.

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 4

June 25, 2022

Rapunzel all but leaped into Eugene’s arms with a shout. The princess had never really been shy about expressing herself, especially when it came to Eugene. Thankfully, Flynn was physically able to catch her and she had a very light frame. He swept her up in his arms and pulled her close for a kiss.

“Oh my goodness, Eugene!” Rapunzel said. “It feels like I haven’t seen you forever. I’ve got so much to tell you.”

“The eternal optimist,” Eugene said. “I wasn’t as sure that I would ever see you again but I kept going just in case. I’m glad to be proven wrong.”

“I like proving you wrong,” Rapunzel said. “And I’ll always find my way back to you. I promise. You know how important promises are to me.”

“I do,” Eugene said. “One of the many reasons why I proposed. Your honesty and loyalty has really rubbed off on me.”

“Oh?” Rapunzel asked. “Have you been well-behaved?”

“Yes,” Eugene said. “But I didn’t have much choice. I was imprisoned by a witch.”

“Really!?” Rapunzel asked and stepped back to examine him. “Did she hurt you?”

“Not really. She was a very incompetent witch,” Eugene said. “She caught me off guard when I ended up in Hawaii.”

“Hawaii?” Rapunzel asked. “I like the name. Speaking of witches, Gothel is here.”

“Gothel?” Eugene asked. “Last time I saw her, she stabbed me.”

“I remember,” Rapunzel said. “She’s locked up in a cell, though. Everybody knows who and what she is so there’s nobody for her to manipulate here.”

“Have you seen her?” Eugene asked.

“No,” Rapunzel said. “I haven’t visited.”

“Do you want to visit?” Eugene asked. He stroked her cheek with his hand and she closed her eyes and pressed her cheek into his palm.

“No,” Rapunzel said. “I don’t think I want to revisit that chapter of my life. Besides, my hair is coming back in and she’s obsessed with it.”

“I was going to ask about that,” Eugene said. “Any explanation?”

“None,” Rapunzel said with a shrug. “As for Gothel, let the others deal with her. If I have to deal with her, I’ll cross that bridge then.”

“We will,” Eugene said. “Together.”

*         *          *

“Anna!” Elsa shouted. “There you are! I was so worried.”

“I wasn’t,” Anna said. “Ok well, I was a little bit. It got really bad there for a bit but I always have faith that we’ll find each other again. We’ve been through so much already. The long separation, the blizzard of Arendelle, the elemental spirits, the Enchanted Forest, the Jotunn, the flood, everything and we’re still standing.”

“I remember all of that, of course,” Elsa said. “But I like being there to protect you.”

“I should remind you that I’m a queen now too and that I can take care of myself,” Anna said. “But I also do like it when you protect me. I like being with you.”

“I never thought we’d be in this strange place,” Elsa said. “So far from home. I sent Mattias back to Arendelle to check on things.”

“I hope he’s alright,” Anna said. “I hope Kristoff is alright too. All of our friends and family are nowhere in sight.”

“I have a feeling that I would know if something permanent happened to Olaf,” Elsa said. “Kristoff can take care of himself usually and when he can’t, he has Sven.”

“True,” Anna said. “I’m sure he’s fine. I do wish the Grand Pabbie was here, though.”

“We seem to be in good hands with the fairies,” Elsa said. “They seem wise enough.”

“I never thought I’d see a real fairy,” Rapunzel said. “It was amazing.”

“The way our lives have gone, I thought it was pretty much inevitable that we would get around to fairies,” Elsa said.

Anna laughed. “I guess you’re right,” she said. “We seem to attract magic.”

“At least, I do,” Elsa said, a guilty look crossing her face

“Don’t go blaming yourself,” Anna said. “We’re in this together.”

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 3

June 11, 2022

The portal opened, Enchantress beckoned, and everybody came through. Aurora came through first with her hand on her sword hilt as usual but relaxed when it seemed that everything was safe and calm for the moment. Jasmine was impressed that she walked right up to Jasmine and shook her hand as clearly, she was in charge. Aladdin was standing next to her but he did really exude royalty. This armor-clad woman exuded a lot of royalty.

“Thank you for your hospitality,” she said. “My name is Princess Aurora and I will do my best to use this sword to safeguard our cause and wellbeing.”

“Thank you,” Jasmine said. “I am Queen Jasmine, ruler of this land. Your oath is unnecessary but welcome. This scruffy man is my consort and husband Aladdin.”

“Nice to meet you,” Aladdin said a little too casually but Jasmine let it slide, of course. There would be time and energy for manners and etiquette later. Besides, that smile of his was impossible to be mad at for long.

Aurora turned as Adam, Belle, Tiana, Esmerelda, and Eugene walked through the portal together. Jasmine was relieved that none of them looked monstrous. Perhaps this would all work out after all. She reapplied her best smile.

“Welcome to Agrabah!” She called out. “All who come in peace are welcome. It is unfortunate that I am hosting you in this recently seized enemy fortress instead of the palace. It is hard to be so generous to guests here but we make do. We will find somewhere for you to sleep in private before we get to the matter at hand.” Jasmine turned toward Enchantress. “We have time to rest before, right?” But Enchantress was no longer there. Godmother looked just as startled.

“I will go find her,” Godmother said. “I’m sure there must be time to rest before the final battle.” Godmother vanished in a shower of sparkles. Somehow, the sparkles seemed as frustrated as Godmother’s face had been.

“She’s a lot to handle,” Belle said. “But I am pretty sure she means well this time.”

“Um, where is our prisoner?” Adam asked. “She was right here.” Yzma had been in chains among them. Enchantress had insisted and now the bony old witch had disappeared. She did not seem extraordinarily bright so it was a surprise that she had vanished.

“And I thought I was sneaky,” Eugene said, rubbing his chin in thought.

“Do you think she escaped?” Adam asked. “Is that even possible?”

“I don’t think so,” Eugene said. “I think we were robbed. I would know. I mean, I used to know. I mean, I know how that feels.” 

“I’m wondering if this is another thing to ask Enchantress,” Jasmine said. “That list is growing. I’m not exactly pleased.”

“Neither are we,” Adam said. “We’ll corner her later.”

Belle turned and looked at Jasmine and her cheeks blushed with embarrassment. “Oh!” she said sheepishly. “I’m sorry. We haven’t introduced ourselves. I’m Belle. Queen Belle, I guess.”

“Um,” Adam said softly.

“Is that not correct, dear?” Belle asked.

“To be determined,” Adam said. “We haven’t had time to investigate our status. Regardless, my name is Adam and I’m Belle’s husband.”

“All of this royal stuff can be kind of hard to navigate,” Aladdin said. “I still struggle and we both understand.”

“We do,” Jasmine said. “We really do.”

Esmerelda started to juggle and dance a bit to lighten the mood. “Esmerelda, of the Romani people, entertainer extraordinaire and voice of the people,” Esmerelda said as an introduction.. “At your service.”

“Wow,” Jasmine said. “You remind me a bit of Genie. You two should meet. Or maybe that might be too chaotic.” 

Aladdin looked over at Eugene. “And you’re a thief, right?” he asked.

Jasmine gasped. “Aladdin!” she said. “You can’t just say that!”

Eugene was startled and his eyes went wide. “Thief? That’s a hell of an accusation,” he said. “I’d be offended if it weren’t so accurate. Former thief. Now a prince. People call me Flynn Rider.” Jasmine relaxed and Aladdin smiled triumphantly.

“I was a thief too,” Aladdin said reassuringly. “I’m glad you also got the chance to turn it around, Eugene.”

“I’m trying,” Eugene said. “For example, my real name is Eugene. I’m still a prince, though.”

“Nice to meet you, Eugene,” Aladdin said. “We’ll have a lot to talk about.”

“Well, I guess I’m a princess too but I’m more of a restauranteur,” Tiana said. “Tiana is my name and Tiana’s Palace is my restaurant. If you point me to the kitchen, I can whip something up.”

“That’s not necessary,” Jasmine said. “You all probably need a rest. Leave the hospitality up to me and my people.”

“I’ll cook the victory feast then,” Tiana said.

“It’s a deal,” Jasmine said. “I like that optimism. Let’s get you all settled.”

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Endgame Pt. 1

May 7, 2022

“Are you sure you know what you’re doing?” Belle asked. “How are you going to bridge the gap?” She squinted at The Enchantress as she held Adam’s hand tightly.

“Would you stop picking at me?” The Enchantress said as she tried to focus on her magic. “It’s distracting.”

“What are you going to do about it?” Belle asked with a sly smirk. “Are you going to turn me into furniture?”

“I could, you know,” The Enchantress said. “You’re very brave now that I’ve promised not to use my magic on you. It’s kind of annoying.”

“Well, yes,” Belle said. “And I’m having a lot of fun.”

“Maybe we should have a little less fun?” Ariel asked, although she did look amused. “Maybe focus on the threat at hand?”

“Fine,” Belle said and shrugged. “I’ll stop torturing her. We’ve made amends and the matter is over.”

“But to answer your question,” The Enchantress said. “I am using my desire to help you heroes to guide my magic. I admit that desire is not entirely altruistic but it is real and it should help locate and connect to the other major point that is experiencing a higher level of portal generation.”

“I really hope that the people there are friendly,” Aurora said, holding the hilt of her sword. 

“My intuition tells me that a villain is not responsible for all of the portalling,” The Enchantress said. “I can feel it. There’s so much of it. They tried to conquer only four worlds that I’ve seen. That suggests that their forces are small. I think if they were invading more worlds then it would be slower. Merely conjecture, though.”

“A fair assumption,” Belle said. “Historically, invasions require a lot of preparation and amassing of forces. Of course, we’re dealing with magic here.”

“We are dealing with magic,” Adam agreed. “Tricky stuff.”

“Let’s remain optimistic,” Tiana said with a smile. “Okay, people?” She had grabbed a heavy iron skillet from the kitchen and was ready to use it if necessary.

“I agree,” Esmerelda said. “Optimistic yet practical. I mean, we can’t account for the unknown.”

“Yes,” Aurora said. “We go into the unknown cautious and prepared. Let’s hope that we’re meeting friends and not enemies.”

“This is exciting,” Ariel said. “It reminds me of when I was first headed to the surface. I’m so excited for you but I’m not going.”

“What?” Aurora nearly shouted which caused The Enchantress to wince slightly. “You’re our leader. You’re knowledgeable about magic and you’re smart.”

“We have plenty of people knowledgeable about magic that can go with you including The Enchantress,” Ariel said. “I need to dive down and explore Atlantica and make sure my father and his subjects are safe. I also need to find Eric. I know that sound selfish.”

“Not at all,” Belle said. “If anything, I’m hesitant to let you deal with a whole underwater kingdom by yourself. I would be curious to go with you if I were equipped to do so.”

“I’m not alone,” Ariel said. “With Ursula’s influence on the minds of my kingdom dissipated, I have plenty of hands on deck. I’ll be fine. If you want to visit Atlantica later, I’m sure some spell could make it possible.”

“I’d like that,” Belle said. She was eternally curious but the water was one area that she had very little knowledge in. She did not even know how to swim. At least, not very well. Still, it sounded like an adventure.

“But you can count us in,” Moana said. “Maui and I know all about the sea. We can help you. Afterwards, you can send us home.”

“I’m not a fan of being volunteered but sure,” Maui said. “You’ve got my hook.”

“Alright,” Ariel said. “Offer accepted. I’m begging the rest of you to go with The Enchantress and save all of our worlds. If the threat is truly not over, your skills will be needed. We will join you later if necessary.”

“It’s a deal,” Aurora said. “It was an honor serving alongside you, Queen Ariel.”

“The feeling is mutual, Queen Aurora.” Ariel said. “I have enjoyed having you all as guests and teammates for however long you’ve been here. Know that, if it is possible, you are welcome to visit here again.”

“So formal!” Tiana said and hugged her. “Come here!” Esmerelda hugged both of them. They laughed.

“I’ll bring the Festival of Fools with me,” Esmerelda said. “We’ll make it a party.”

“We deserve some fun,” Ariel said. “Everybody’s invited.”

“Are we all just about ready?” The Enchantress called out. “The door is about to open.”

“We’re ready,” Aurora said.

“For better or worse,” Belle said. “Let’s put an end to this.”

The Enchantress gestured and a portal opened up. “Let’s go meet our friends on the other side,” She said.

They walked toward the portal and stepped through one by one.


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