Posts Tagged ‘Ring of Honor’

Why I Love Pro-Wrestling: Love That Danhausen

September 13, 2021

Since I have been getting back into the world of pro-wrestling, I have been once again scouring YouTube for my beloved weirdos. I love good technical skill but I am a sucker for a strange gimmick. These are the performers who are often polarizing like Orange Cassidy, Abadon, Alexa Bliss, and more. One of the names that has gained a cult following online is Danhausen and for good reason. The performer (named Donovan Danhausen) has created a compelling little weirdo and the gimmick is really going places.

Not much is known about Danhausen because he is shrouded in mystery and his answers in interviews are either evasive or made up on the spot. What we do know is that he comes to the ring with his face painted like a death metal musician, spooky leather pants, and extensive tattoos. He does not have the best physique but he is definitely pretty fit. He comes off as nerdy and awkward through his movements but is definitely capable of technical wrestling. Like other comedy wrestlers, if he was not good at wrestling, he would not be as popular. People buy into the weirdness but at the end of the day, he gets things done.

Danhausen speaks in the third person and often adds ‘hausen’ at the end of words in his sentences. He speaks with an odd, high-pitched voice that his performer describes as “a mix between Conan O’Brien and Mark Hammill’s Joker”. Danhausen is entirely focused on wrestling supremacy as a means to dominate the world and get sacks of cash. Everything he does is focused on that goal. As part of that, he does not care much for other pro-wrestlers. He often gets their name wrong either through apathy or as a psychological tactic. Either way, it definitely throws people off of their game. The only wrestlers that he manages to befriend are ones that he feels will get him closer to his goals.

For example, he has recently teamed up with the French-Canadian Frankenstein PCO. The two work well together. PCO is not the brightest barbarian but he can take a lot of damage and deal just as much to opponents. Danhausen is more wily and quick and the combination is really starting to turn some heads in the Ring of Honor tag division. Teaming these two popular misfits together seems odd at first but makes a lot of sense. PCO is not much of a talker, Danhausen cannot stop talking even during matches. Danhausen sees himself as an evil mastermind and PCO does not care as long as he gets to hurt people.

Let’s run through some other parts of Danhausen’s gimmick.

NO SWEARING!

Danhausen hates it when anybody on camera with him swears. It is not that he objects to swear words but he objects to what swear words do. If somebody swears in a YouTube video or on Ring of Honor episodes, that segment might be censored or cut. That means less money for Danhausen. Danhausen may be very evil but he is also very practical. He recognizes that demonetization has become a big thing on YouTube and other platforms and he wants to prevent it from interfering with him receiving huge sacks of cash (which he strangely calls “human money”).

Teeth

Danhausen carries a jar of human teeth to the ring. Nobody is sure where Danhausen obtains these teeth but he promises that they are ethically sourced. He has claimed that some were sent to him by actor/wrestler David Arquette. He may have stolen some from other people. The teeth understandably confuse his opponents who are not expecting people to bring teeth down to the ring. When he has his opponent down, he will often pour the teeth into their mouth and then hit them so that he has effectively knocked their teeth out.

Tequila!

Danhausen admires Pee Wee Herman. Herman is a great warrior in Danhausen’s eyes because he faced down a whole bar full of bikers once by performing a dance to the song Tequila by The Champs. Danhausen has adopted this warrior song for his own use. In the middle of a match, the music may start up which prompts Danhausen to dance like Pee Wee did. However, he adds in a few kicks to his opponent as he dances.

Adaptation to Weirdness

Danhausen is able to mesh with other strange wrestlers. He has fought the eternally lazy Orange Cassidy in the past. He has the aforementioned tag team with PCO. However, on the indy scene, he had two tag teams that really showed off his strangeness. The first was with WARHORSE whose name is capitalized for good reason because he is loud and forceful. The other tag team was with queer wrestler Effy who formed the tag team Gaytanic Panic with Danhausen. Danhausen adapts really well to the gimmick of whoever he is facing and alters his gimmicks to work with the match. Here are some examples:

Why I Love Pro-Wrestling: Alternative to WWE

September 11, 2014

WILPW

In this modern world we live in, despite what conspiracy theorists might say, we live in a world full of freedom.  As a consumer, we have freedom of choice.  As long as we have the money then we can buy whatever we want.  We are adults.  Ice cream for breakfast? Done.  Bacon on that burger?  Done.  Of course, this freedom of choice can sometimes come with what I call “the paralysis of choice”.  “How can I choose between one hundred different shampoos?”  This can be tough and requires shopping around.  The upside?  If you don’t like something there’s a lot of competition out there to check out.

I have definitely sampled a lot of wrestling and I’m always interested to check out companies that are new to me.  These are the companies that I have seen and I continue to search out more and more.  I have not watched really any of the Japanese or Mexican promotions.  I want to though.

MCW Maryland Championship Wrestling

The state of Maryland is near and dear to my heart.  It makes sense that I should throw some love to MCW, a local treasure.  The company has been around in some form or another for a long time and a lot great performers have passed through there.  They continue to have great independent wrestlers while playing host to big stars to draw crowds.  It does not hurt that I am a huge fan of Justin Shlegel, 98 Rock personnel and royal adviser of Ryan McBride.

Covey Pro Wrestling

I have seen exactly one episode of Covey Pro Wrestling but it felt pretty fun.  As I said on twitter, this one is country as hell.  The episode I saw was staged in a high school gym but the performers looked dedicated and hard working.  There were no real high spots or anything flashy.  It was old school, hoss wrestling but sometimes that can be nice.  This promotion serves West Virgina, Maryland, Pennsylvania and I think Virginia.

ROH Ring of Honor

The biggest independent promotion in the country.  They are funded by Sinclair broadcasting and they hire only the best talent from around the country and internationally.  They have a weekly show and regular internet payperviews.  They are the most polished of all of the organizations below TNA and WWE.  In fact, both companies regularly raid ROH for talent.

TNA  Total Nonstop Action

The second biggest promotion in the United States (and maybe the world?) behind WWE.  They seem to hire a lot of ex-WWE wrestlers but they have done a pretty good job over the years of generating their own talent or hiring from ROH.   They were revolutionary back in the day but when they sold the company to Dixie Carter the company started to go downhill.   The booking often doesn’t make sense and some of the gimmicks are really stupid.  Still, the perfomers have heart and I still find myself floating back to it after quitting it in disgust.

CHIKARA

CHIKARA is silly as hell.  It has goofy over-the-top performances and cartoon characters as performers.  I have not seen a whole lot of their product but the matches are often dynamite.  The comedy is often mixed into a highly technical match with amazing athleticism.  Besides, there are few other American promotions that I know of that can stop a match in the middle for a dance off between the competitors.  There is no other promotion who has hired both Bob Saget and Dave Coullier to be in story authority figures.
Or you could dig up some archives of other defunct promotions some of which are on the WWE Network. (Only $9.99/month!)  These would include WCCW, WCW, ECW and Smokey Mountain Wrestling.

Bonus Honorable Mention:
Wrestling Society X

I actually really liked MTV’s wrestling show back in the day.  The production values were amazing (including special effects which were so bad they were good) and the wrestling was pretty top notch.  Unfortunately they made Vampiro their champ but nobody’s perfect.  You can still find all of it on Youtube.  Check it out.

Double Bonus Mention:
NXT
NXT is unfortunately only available on the WWE network but it is the one show that I definitely do not miss each week.  It’s WWE’s farm league basically but they push the boundaries and try a lot of wacky and fun stuff on there.  The women’s division on NXT is the best I have seen.  There is a lot more comedy that is a lot less forced.  Besides, it’s got Enzo Amore who is quickly becoming one of my favorites.


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